Thursday, February 14, 2008

...Happy Lovers Day....

Hey You peoples.... if youre with your boo... Hug 'em! Kiss 'em! and all that mush mush... Cuz I'm jealous. Yea yea, I'm out here a floatin and the boo is back home eating Tostido's.

Take a moment to think about Love and the first time you said it and how they looked.... or how you began on this venture... cuz i am! LOL! ch'yea.

So What are your plans world?! Being that I am at work I plan on....well... mother fuking working...Oh and watching sorry 80's movies like "Weekend At Benrie's"... you know i always wondered WHY the hell Baernie never got like rigor mortis?! is it just me that thinks about that?!

I got my boo some nice stuff:) I try:)... I think tomorrow when I get into my home... i wanna unwind... with the Boo and the kids (Rainbow and Sebastian) and watch good movies... and makeout and eat a bomb dinner.

Florentine Stuffed Chicken in a light lemon butter Garlic sauce, smooth buttered mashed potatoes and some asparugus... YUMMMMM.... that ought to be fantastic! I can't wai to cook it! Hopefully she will enjoy that! then a massage... you know to unwind the dinner tension... and the rest aint no bodies business!!! And I know you were waiting for the details.... Creeps! LMAO!

Anyhoot.... Fucking happy V-Day all:)

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

...Life or something like it....

So for the past 4.5 years of my life I have been 0nboard the big CVN76... and Wow has it been an interesting experiance. I am about to leave and I didn't think I'd be as sad as I find myself at times. I met a lot of great people in these years and have formed a lot of relationships that are just as close to me as family... and I want them to know, I'll miss them alot.

Ok enough for the soft moments.

I'm going to join culture shock dance studio. Get fit and try to convince Maleah that Go-Go dancing is a cool thing and she should mind it... at all. Do you think GoGo dancing is sleazy? I think it's an awesome way to network and get hooked up for fashion and makeup and shit... Even though i dont really do make up... LOL... But what woman doesn't LOVE the Camera?! Herro?!?!
Yea so about dance... I wanna be professional-ish... hahaha! Baggy pants... nice sneakers a beater and some tight abs.... I really am just in it for the Abs... I'm over the flab of 24. LMAO!

(__) 20 and now.... at 24 (__________) BOOOTAY! *shrugs*

Yea yea... so I'm going to feature on of my recent poems and hit you folks up later with an adventure.... until then...

Poem Preface: I tend to railroad my experiances in relationships together... borrowing moments and detatils from each... like a conglomorate of myself and the different woman i was with each... Here is my latest...

.i sometimes wish you were still around so you could read this and understand.
i couldn't stop staring at the ground
wishing over and over again that maybe
my lack of eye contact would encourage
you to silence and listento the sun warm our faces.
I guess this was always a problem.
you not knowing when i needed you stop
and me always needing you to stop.

This was a trip i usually took on my own,
listening to the somber melody of a hobo's
out-of-tune violin creep flat tones as my
imagination ran rampant cutting blades of grass.

I was contemplating life and Tea when you
called out my name from the entrance.
Your order was something like that of
a War between Italian and Brazilian blends.
You might as well have delivered a revolutionsome
where between 2 extra shots of expresso and no foam.

You were prettier than I had remembered, as our
last meeting was not so full of fond banter;
you still held your mouth slightly open while
you waited for some sort of result, you hissed
as coffee ran down the sides of your cup.

What did we even argue about that day.
All I could replay was the paintings falling
and arms flailing about as we remodeled every
insult and admittance of love, sweeping
happiness into the darkest corners of the kitchen.
And me complaining something about your endless bitching.

I never cleaned under the refridgerator,
it was too hard to reach and you always screamed
about my noncondusive efforts in resolving
absolutely nothing and i snickered snide remarks
at your denial of being the next Dictator of probiting
love and affections between the hours of 5PM and 6AM.

We worked so far from one another like we'd slept
in an infested union of sheets and skin and
relief was only served in break rooms once every 4 hours.

I thought of you every single millisecond
once you'd left, I never cared to make an attempt to
find you. expunging all evidence of belonging
to someone, to something, i liberated myselfso-to-speak.

from every un-natural act, and so it seemed
Love had proven itself to fall in this category
so I'd come here, to this spot in the grass to forget
you. me. us. how you took the damn dog. our laughter. and the
Vase your Mother sent us for Christmas in '02.

You talk about how happy you are, your career, your wife
and how absolutely perfectly fine every wonderful thing
has fallen into it's perfect place in your life.
And here I am, wearing the same smile i had 3 years ago.
giving the same reasons for the same mistakes
going through withdrawls, disillusionment and the shakes.

My eyes flood as you ramble on about whats-her-name
while i prayed to forget yours and exactly how you
smiled the first time i spoke it and at this point
i'm frsutrated becuase i can't get the ground to move
and i can't get you to stop; just stop and listen.

listen to the sky tell you of blue
listen to the walls recite my apologies
listen to the difficulty in the wind
listen to the tap of my fingers on your knee

You're beautiful. I break your sentence and
compliment your aura. You're beautiful.
So beautiful, I can not bear to listen
to how beauty found happiness and how happiness
sleeps with you every night and how we, we were
never right beyond the fact opposites attract
so i subtract and substracted again, myself.

and left you. stutter stepping over your words
the moment and the fact that the ground never moved
and how you never recognized my discomfort,
how you were always so caught up in your reality
of how perfect your imperfections were.

I tried to pretend to pretend to kiss you
upon my exit, but the wind chaffed my thoughts
leaving the back of my throat just as dry as the moment
and again you were gone and i knew then
I could only have you as I wanted you
in the silent requiem of my tea and that hobo's sad song.

...don't get drunk at Spasketti noodles and get into a fight with a crazy chick and her knife...

Ummm ch'yea... talk about a "Whoa WTF"...

So we meet the crew, as you will come to learn consists of the following

  1. meg
  2. crystal
  3. charles
  4. pnut
  5. melissa
  6. Krissya
  7. me [tab]
  8. maleah
and give or take a few misc. people who would like to be as cool as we are.... Any way so... we meet the Crew at a neighborhood bar, Bourbon street and decide to drunkenly go back to elis' and K's to eat the spasketti's i made earlier [SO GOOD]... well we go to a corner storre to get some noodles... set our plan and stone and me and Maleah begin walking down the street...

"Ayo, I know you aint looking at my girls ass" says the Barbiturate dyke with the bull hair cut.

"What?...the fuuuuuuuck" I whisper to Maleah... as we walk by laughing....
No one was looking at her boo in her dingy ass pajama pants.... chick are you fucking serious rightnow? I'm drunk... i can't focus on the sidewalk let alone..Ya'll.

"Ayo, dont be looking at my girls ass..." yells the Barbiturate dyke.

"What Bitch?! No one was lookin at your girl so you need to shut the fuck up" I yell in my best ghetto black girl voice...

"Yea Whatever home girl", snaps the Barbiturate dyke in her best ghetto black girl voice...

::PAUSE:: I think.... did this trick just mock me, in my best ghetto black girl thinking voice.... I KNOW THIS Female did not just mock me...

And that quick i wa sin her face and here comes Maleah with a flying pack of spasketti int he girls face... And when I tell you ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE.... it did... Scuffles.. and then...


WHAT?!?!?! The crazy Barbiturate dyke has a knife... and so... i immediately go into trained black belt mold... while i thrash this chick all about the sidewalk in the street finally ending with her head slamming against a brick wall leaving her a bit more than speechless.... LMAO! she was just gonna cut me?!? like tak my life over her girl friend plaid dingy pajama pants?! and the enitre time her girl is apologizing to us... and i'm thinking...

"chick if you dont take those sorry's and get your girl under control i'm going to put them somewhere for you..."

somewhere in there Melissa break a beer bottle straight Chicano style and puts it in the chicks face... but that moment is a blur... P.S. I love you Melissa:)

So the fight ends with the chick eating bricks and everyone scattering as 1....2...3 POLICE cars drive down the street. Where is Tabitha and Maleah you ask... in my car driving as fast as they could away from the scene.... Come to find out... they question everyone.... the girl get handcuffed...cited for the knife... and everyone shows back up at M and K's....

without the spasketti's but ONE HELL OF A FUXXIN STORY! And i was deemed "Knuckles" for the rest of the weekend.

Where are the camera crews when you need them?!

....crack kills...

Ummm ok... so im thinking i might become slightly addicted to this blog... LOL and i'm wondering who is reading it. And I kinda am like... i wonder if people i know are reading my blogs and if they are....

If they are MY blogs are they allowed to be upset with me for saying something abou thtem that may not be "Top 8 Suitable?".... speaking of Myspace.... Who the Fuck lives and dies by that website....

*raises hand* Ummm yea I do... and i dont even know why... it like creeped out of no where. I remember BlackPlanet and Migente and how cool it was to have glittery Roses and falling graphics and shit... But Myspace... Talk about some Beyonce, Up grade Ya type of shit... Damn... you can post like 9487539875934753 pictures and just as many albums... post blogs.... and lose friends in the matter of an hour...

Friend 1: are we not cool anymore took me out of your top 8
Friend 2: Are you kidding me... we've been friends since kindergarden?

Friend 1: Well we can't be friends unless i'm in your Top 4 atleast!

OMG! Myspace is eating up the world... Like job actually have a place on their applications for your myspace page... LOL! Dear Lord.... And the internet revolution! And hell yes I'm a Hypocrite! LOL!!

So.... Anyways. I have the best group of friends one could ask for. We are dysfunctional in a Osbourne kind of way but damnit.... I love them! With all my heart. We were trying to start a band.... Melissa being the Lead... Meg on guitar, Crystal on the drum and me with the vocals but everytime we go to practice we end up too drunk... hahahahaha! So it's been a long time coming.

Weird stuff: -My Boo has moments when Hyper is not the word so i find her with her pants pulled up to her neck walking around... it's adorable, really...believe me.

P.S. if you're wondering about the her part.... I'll explain that later but we're all smart cookies...or doughnuts or whatever....

Off to write another blog... and this one will be Funnay!

...and the wheels on the bus go round and round....

and so this is my first blog on here ever. And i'm excited. I keep trying to get everyone to do this with me this is turning out to be a veture all my own!

ONWARD TO THE GREAT BLOGGY WILDERNESS....and what nots... So I guess htis is the part where i probably should tell you things about myself that are important to know like...

My name is Tabitha. I'm 24.... I have a cat named Rainbow [who happens to be a fucking Queen Diva] and a Dog named Sebastian. I have a boo but later on we'll talk about.... i'm in the navy... (oooorah, or maybe not?) i don't care too much for the job but it pays the bills so none-the-less.... here we go!

So i'm sitting at work bored out of my fucking mind and decide that im going to order clothes off of yea ummmm charged me 298.68 but sent me no conformation and ummm has no history of my purchase....errrrr what the fuck fuckery.... but yea.... i freak out and go to call my bank, they say...

"Oh Hi Ms. Brown... Yes it charged your card twice but it's only on hold it hasn't been debited yet"

and i'm thinking, holy shit fuckery BATMAN.... i got GOT.... by the christians! LMAO! (reference the bible verse on there merchandise)

so.... now i have to wait on them to open beofre i can call and inquire to get half of the $600 accidental dollars spent... BACK. fa sho.

So as I mentionned I have a dog...well, who really is a puppy... well the little cute shit....likes to shit... a lot.... but only NEXT to his puppy pads... not on them... and i think he silently cracks the fuck up every damn time i clean it up... i'm his bitch yea.... no pun intended. My boo informed me he had his first hump yesterday! Horray My BOY! gettin it on and his balls haven't even dropped yet.... Whattya know!

What else... OH! DUH! I'm a poet on under the pen name Succinct....

Anyhoot. I feel like i'm going to have a lot of fun bloggin here so stay tuned cuz my life should not only be recorded but i need a fucking production company. word.

Currently Listening:

M.I.A. "Big Stick"

slam dunk hoez.
Tabi out.